We all have storms come through our lives, but one thing is for sure—we have no right to make everyone else miserable with our own unhappiness. No need to rain on others' parades. A simple story illustrates this point:
The carpenter I hired to help me restore an old farmhouse had just finished a rough first day on the job. A flat tire made him lose an hour of work, his electric saw quit, and now his ancient pick up truck refused to start.
While I drove him home, he sat in stony silence.
On arriving, he invited me in to meet his family. As we walked toward the front door, he paused briefly at a small tree, touching tips of the branches with both hands.
When opening the door, he underwent an amazing transformation. His tanned face was wreathed in smiles, and he hugged his two small children and gave his wife a kiss.
Afterward he walked me to the car. We passed the tree, and my curiosity got the better of me. I asked him about what I had seen him do earlier.
"Oh, that's my trouble tree," he replied. "I know I can't help having troubles on the job, but one thing's for sure, troubles don't belong in the house with my wife and the children. So I just hang them up on the tree every night when I come home. Then in the morning I pick them up again.
"Funny thing is," he smiled, "when I come out in the morning to pick 'em up, there ain't nearly as many as I remember hanging up the night before."
I don't know who first told this story—no one seems to know—but he or she must have been a very wise person. Putting boundaries around our problems is a really good idea—it prevents our difficulties from spilling over onto other people (especially our loved ones), who can't do anything about our problems. Why burden them if they can't help us?
So, plant yourself a trouble tree outside your front door—or a potted trouble plant, if you live in an apartment—and use it whenever you come home. Be grateful that you have loved ones to go home to, even if your loved one is simply your beloved dog or cherished cat or prized goldfish. And when you pick up your troubles on the way out each morning, be grateful that they're not as heavy as they were the night before.
Shared from the book 'Dance in the rain'; contributed by my friend Sunny
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One gem of audio-visual presentation I've come across after a while... the message is a fresh reminder at the very least, that a quiet relaxing pause in this hussle of life, is much more important than we consider it to be.
Enjoy:
http://positivepause.com/
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Different people have different perception. One man's meat could be another man's poison.
A couple bought a donkey from the market. On the way home, a boy commented, "Very stupid. Why neither of them rides on the donkey?"
Upon hearing that, the husband let the wife ride on the donkey. He walked besides them. Later, an old man saw it and commented, "The husband is the head of family. How can the wife ride on the donkey while the husband is on foot?"
Hearing this, the wife quickly got down and let the husband ride on the donkey. Further on the way home, they met an old Lady. She commented, "How can the man ride on the donkey but let the wife walk. He is no gentleman."
The husband thus quickly asked the wife to join him on the donkey. Then, they met a young man. He commented, "Poor donkey, how can you hold up the weight of two persons. They are cruel to you."
Hearing that, the husband and wife immediately climbed down from the donkey and carried it on their shoulders. It seems to be the only choice left. Later, on a narrow bridge, the donkey was frightened and struggled. They lost their balance ...and fell into the river.
You can never have everyone praise you, or condemn you, all the time. Thus, do not be too bothered by words of others if your own conscience is clear.
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Buddha is moving on the road and it is noon. It is very hot. He feels thirsty and tells his disciple, Ananda, “Please go back, we crossed a small stream just two-three miles back, from there bring some water for me.” And Buddha rested under the tree.
Ananda went to the stream. But just when he reached near it, a few bullock carts passed the stream, and since the stream was very small, now it became dirty. All the dirt that was settled underneath had surfaced, including the old dry leaves. The water was no more drinkable.
Ananda tried the same as you would try – he entered the stream and tried to settle things so that water can become clean again. But the poor disciple only dirtied it more. Disappointed, he came back and requested to Buddha “the water is not drinkable, but I know a certain river ahead, I will go and fetch water from there."
But Buddha insisted “Why did you come back? No, I want the water from that stream only”. When Buddha insists, how could Ananda deny? So reluctantly, he went again. But his hesitation changed to joy as he realized something looking at the water again - by the time he reached half of the dirt had settled again without anybody trying to settle it, it had settled on its own accord. He understood the point this time!
Then he sat under the tree and watched the stream flow to let the other half of dirt get settled. He waited, he watched, and soon the water was clear, the dead leaves had gone back to the bottom and the dirt was all gone as well. Fetching the clear water for his master, Ananda came joyfully running and fell at Buddha’s feet to say, "Oh Lord, that’s the mistake I had been doing my mind my whole life! But now I will just sit under a tree and let the stream of mind pass by, let it settle by itself. Now I will not jump in the stream and try to force order upon things”.
This is not to say that order isn't necessary. It is. But many a times, we waste our precious moments and sacrifice happiness to chase things which time is going to settle on its own anyways. A broken heart takes time to heal. Peace of mind doesn't come in an instant. Understanding your spouse takes time too. Don't always jump to settle the mud on your own - give time a chance to do its job as you just wait and watch with hope that, sooner or later, the dirt is going to get settled on its own.
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